Computer Chuckles


#8

#9

#10

I was at the inventor of the USB stick’s funeral yesterday.

They lowered his coffin into the ground, then raised it back up, turned it around, and lowered it back down again.


#11

#12

Use a brother label maker to put the word “UP” on it

public service message complements of BD6


#13

Or they could fucking have designed the leads with fucking rotational symmetry


#14

#15

Comments in the code

we used to be forced to have cobol walkthrus b4 I got away from coding until I stated my intention to take hostile action against someone


#16

Every quality team has code reviews, Duke.


#17

Robot has skillz!


#18

#19

I’m sure I poasted this before, but I can’t find it. So here it is (again). BD6 and DM will like this.


A computer programmer’s wife sends her husband to the store.

She says, “Buy a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, get a dozen.”

An hour later, he returns home with twelve loaves of bread. She asks, “Why did you get twelve loaves of bread?”

Her husband replies, "Because they had eggs.”


#20

How could it be any other way


#21

In Brazil, a program can also mean a hookup with a prostitute.

Your call girl is our “Program girl”

20 years ago, my nerdy friend Warley was learning code and doing some freelance and whatever

We were at this party, and since he was shy, I called 2 girls and introduced one to him and started talking to the other

They’re doing small talk, she asks if he works and he says “I do programs” instead of “I program”. But sounded ok, but ya know, it was 20 years ago and people were computer ignorant here.

The girl I was talking also stopped and looked at him and I Warley understands nothing. I started laughing and say “He means computer programs. But tell me, does he look like a male whore?” Best ice breaker ever, girls laughed their assed off, he later got some at the back of his red Fiat Uno, I got a bj at home cause she was on the rags.

That’s how I used to cure shyness in those assholes


#22

#23

Q: How many wipes does it take to clean a keyboard?

A: qwsedrftgyhujikolpawesdrtfgyhujikloaszxdcrfvgtbhnjmk,lazsxdcfvgsedtfrgyftg67y78u87u8uii9op[;’’;;’/;l/l;.l.k,lkmjkmertyudfghjk12q21q2qw3qwe3we4r45rt6ygerdgfvbwedfcv qwedfscv


#24

Here in Brazoo, everyone is on whatsapp


#25

#26

What’s the difference between USA and USB?
One connects to all of your devices and accesses the data, the other is a hardware standard.


#27