Why did he come home at all?
That poor squirrel. Sheeeesh.
Wait, was the squirrel the weapon she used to stab him?
Or did she stab him because he was “with squirrel”?
Either way, this story is nuts.
If you like your squirrel, you can keep your squirrel.
I bet I know where it was before he got home
If both he and she had been packing squirrel, this never would have happened.
But then you would need BG checks fer ceramic squirrel and yer shoeshine boy would be able to send a swat team to yer house to retrieve sich
I dunno, maybe BG checks is a reasonable price to pay so people don’t go all squirrely in movie theaters and churches.
yeah, but if you have background checks then they know where you are, and they’ll come round up yer squirrels when the shit hits the fan.
Ok, how do you stab someone with a squirrel? Freeze said nuteater first, or just hope squirrel has a hard on?
It was a ceramic squirrel - art and sich to yer trailer trash
The Squirrels, soon to be a major motion picture.
Squirrels are just cute lookin rats. A rodent is a rodent. Kill them all.
Cut down the ten billion oak trees then that grew cause they forgot where they stashed acorns
do fucking rats plant oak tree d_m?
Man, you hardly ever see oak trees around here. I wonder what the squirrels eat in place of acorns. Maybe palm dates. Something is tearing up my peaches… maybe squirrels. Oh well, I don’t care. I done picked all I’m going to pick. I have about 200 in the crisper and no way I’m going to eat half of them before they go bad.
I’m just fukking around about the squirrels. I like them. Rabbits too. Gophers and shit… not so much.
Speaking of the damn gophers… you’ll be happy to know I threw away the traps and abandoned my plan to kill them. My plan changed to running them off to the neighbors yards using sonic devices and so far I have succeeded in getting them to move from my front and back yards. Unfortunately, they have all congregated to a small patch of side yard. This is now like the WW2 Battle of the Bulge. They are the Nazis and I am the Allies. I must break their final stand. My first offensive starts tomorrow at daybreak.