Hey BD6 I hope you have your Squirrels under control/


#1

https://scontent-sea1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xtp1/v/t1.0-9/12208687_1127841713952370_3216712446773870017_n.jpg?oh=813e37c8dc5e8d3dd7162a520e9d37f1&oe=56B5E932


#2

Why did he come home at all?


#3

That poor squirrel. Sheeeesh.


#4

Wait, was the squirrel the weapon she used to stab him?

Or did she stab him because he was “with squirrel”?

Either way, this story is nuts.


#5

If you like your squirrel, you can keep your squirrel.


#6

I bet I know where it was before he got home


#7

ewwwww!


#8

If both he and she had been packing squirrel, this never would have happened.


#9

But then you would need BG checks fer ceramic squirrel and yer shoeshine boy would be able to send a swat team to yer house to retrieve sich


#10

I dunno, maybe BG checks is a reasonable price to pay so people don’t go all squirrely in movie theaters and churches.


#11

yeah, but if you have background checks then they know where you are, and they’ll come round up yer squirrels when the shit hits the fan.


#12

Ok, how do you stab someone with a squirrel? Freeze said nuteater first, or just hope squirrel has a hard on?


#13

It was a ceramic squirrel - art and sich to yer trailer trash


#14

#15

The Squirrels, soon to be a major motion picture.


#16

Squirrels are just cute lookin rats. A rodent is a rodent. Kill them all.


#17

#18

Cut down the ten billion oak trees then that grew cause they forgot where they stashed acorns

do fucking rats plant oak tree d_m?


#19

Man, you hardly ever see oak trees around here. I wonder what the squirrels eat in place of acorns. Maybe palm dates. Something is tearing up my peaches… maybe squirrels. Oh well, I don’t care. I done picked all I’m going to pick. I have about 200 in the crisper and no way I’m going to eat half of them before they go bad.

I’m just fukking around about the squirrels. I like them. Rabbits too. Gophers and shit… not so much.


#20

Speaking of the damn gophers… you’ll be happy to know I threw away the traps and abandoned my plan to kill them. My plan changed to running them off to the neighbors yards using sonic devices and so far I have succeeded in getting them to move from my front and back yards. Unfortunately, they have all congregated to a small patch of side yard. This is now like the WW2 Battle of the Bulge. They are the Nazis and I am the Allies. I must break their final stand. My first offensive starts tomorrow at daybreak.