I told my wife that the mailman said he had screwed every woman in our road except one!!
“I bet it’s the snooty bitch at number twenty three,” she replied.
I told my wife that the mailman said he had screwed every woman in our road except one!!
“I bet it’s the snooty bitch at number twenty three,” she replied.
I recently became addicted to viagra…
My wife has been taking it really, really hard.
DEAR NEIGHBOR:
Hi, George. This is Richard, next door. I’ve a confession to make.
I’ve been riddled with guilt for a few months and have been trying to
get up the courage to tell you face-to-face. At least I’m telling you
in this text I can’t live with myself a minute longer without your
knowing about this. The truth is, when you’re not around, I’ve been
sharing your wife, day and night. Probably much more than you. I
haven’t been getting it at home recently. I know that’s no excuse. The
temptation was just too great. I can’t live with the guilt & hope
you’ll accept my sincere apology and forgive me.
Please suggest a fee for usage and I’ll pay you.
Richard
NEIGHBOR’S RESPONSE:
George, feeling enraged and betrayed, grabbed his gun, went next door,
and shot Richard dead. He returned home, shot his wife, poured himself
a stiff drink and sat down on the sofa. George then looked at his
phone and discovered a second text message from Richard.
SECOND TEXT MESSAGE:
Hi, George. Richard here again. Sorry about the typo on my last text.
I assume you figured it out and noticed that the darned Spell-Check
had changed “wi-fi” to “wife.” Technology, huh? It’ll be the death of
us all
I called my wife at work and asked, "Do you ever get a shooting pain across your body, like someone’s got a voodoo doll of you and they’re stabbing it?”
Sounding concerned, she said, “No.”
I responded, “How about now?”
Statistics say that 1 out of 3 people in a relationship is unfaithful.
.
.
.
I just need to work out if that’s my wife or my girlfriend
Even during sexual congress!
Dumping a cold drink on his terminalia works almost as well.