So here’s what the REAL story of the LV shootings are…
I’m friends with a guy that knows a guy that once saw a gun. He said that a bunch of illegals got together with some Muslims who then teamed up with the FBI and Soros bc they hated country music (being an old country music fan from the 70-90’s, I certainly find this believable considering the state of country music today). Anyway, they all went and bet on 12 Red on the roulette wheel (like James Garner in Support Your Local Sheriff) and when they lost, they had all the guns and Ammo transported to their room by Scotty, the engineer. The problem was that the lithium crystals were failing, and all of them were lost except Paddock, who was severely brain damaged bc of it. He then smoked a joint and looked out the window just as the band was playing another Nashville type country song and decided he had to stop the madness. He called the Russians, who began 20 fake news sites and told him to go ahead and that it was obama, trump and Hillary’s fault. The guns were operated telepathically. No one touched them, they just started shooting. Lee Harvey Oswald showed up and they faked a moon landing. They were planning on escaping to Area 51 but ended up in the fictitious town of Sandy Hook where all the Confederate statues were sent. The last that was seen of them, they were riding a unicorn with Marilyn Monroe leading the way holding a Rebel flag. This is all true bc I know for a fact bc I used to be an usher at the local movie theater. And I used to have a BB gun, so I’m kinda an expert.
Special Thanks to that guy on FB. From which I yoinked dis.