Welcome, Midget!

20s? That seems a bit too young to be official steampunk decor.

20’s? See, and I would have thought it was too old according to some.

I’ll take the liberty of just addressing you as theSameness, if you don’t mind.

Good morning, Peaches.

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Nice.

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“You always want your new loveseat to have been freshly reupholstered.”

Eminently, richly quotable … and thank you.

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I am not sure how you know you can trust the purveyors of said love seat. I mean, you have no way of knowing exactly how many bare asses slid across that thing after it was “freshly” reupholstered and before it got to you.

A critical point, this. It challenges the reader to choose either romance or cynicism as an attitude, but ultimately it simply does not matter how many bare asses have touched there unless it’s stained or encrusted. Fresh is fresh, and a vendors claims are always simply claims.

But the heart knows, and will either leap for joy or harden itself further. That is the choice, Lotus.

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Or, you could just give it a good cleaning before sitting on it.

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There is probably an axiom in the Book of Proverbs that would counsel one to that effect.

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One could also have a trusted dog sniff it and make a report, but this one is quite clean, and unless people have been disrobing in the shop to try it out it is unsoiled by bare asses.

Or both, if you know what I mean.

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I’m sorry, no. What do you mean?

I think you do.

Pretend you don’t.

Why?

Because the avenue of discussion will end if you don’t. Unless you’re fine with that.

Does its end trouble you?

Not in the least, friend. I was only concerned for you since you seem so attached to it.

You were the one who told me to pretend so that it would continue.